Now don't get me wrong--I absolutely love being married. Especially to H. But sometimes I miss the secrecy of it all. The unknown. Trying to figure out if he likes you or when he's going to kiss you. Wondering if he's ever going to text you back. And even when you're dating, wondering where it's going. If you're going to marry them. With marriage there are no "what ifs." You already know that he likes you and he has to text you back because he's your husband. And you just kiss and cuddle and hold hands because that's what you do when you're married. And I love it, but I hate it. You know? It's so weird. When you're married, everything is just so monogamous. But in a good way.
Sometimes I get jealous of my single friends.
I talk to some of my single friends and everything is just so up in the air. They don't know if they're gonna stay here or move away. They don't know if they are going to marry their current boyfriend. With marriage you already know what's going to happen--at least for the most part. You get married, you have kids, you buy a house, you have more kids, etc. And even on a day to day basis, everything is basically planned out. You go to work, come home and eat ramen or rice a roni, cuddle on the couch while you watch tv, do some lovin, and go to bed. And it's great. But it's just the same thing every day. You know? It's never like, "oh who am I gonna hang out with tonight?" or "what party am I gonna hit up this weekend?" And sometimes I wish I could just travel whenever and wherever I wanted to. That I didn't have to worry about a husband saying "no, we need to save money." Sometimes I miss just being able to get crazy with my girlfriends, and have girls nights where we stay up all night talking about boys. Or going to dance parties and meeting new people. When you're single you have a certain sense of freedom. And sometimes I miss that. Because you can't really do any of that anymore. And even when I'm in my car, jamming out to the songs on the radio, I can't really relate to them anymore. Like, I'm married now T-Swift, write some songs about that!
But then again, I'm sure there are girls out there who are jealous of me and wish that they were married. So I don't mean to sound rude or like I'm not happy in my marriage. Because it's the exact opposite. I love marriage. When you're married you have a different sense of freedom, and you can do things that you couldn't when you were single. And you have your best friend by your side every single day. And you don't have to be embarrassed to say something stupid or when you aren't wearing any makeup, because you already know that they love you forever. And you can make them spoon you to sleep, even when they don't want to, because guess what? He's your husband. He has to. And you always have someone to love you, to comfort you, to check the apartment for murderers before he leaves you alone, to carry your bags up and down the stairs [or at Disneyland], and to open the doors for you. Marriage really is the best thing. Ever.
And contradicting what I said above, one of my favorite things about being married is not having to wonder. Throughout my entire relationship with H, I always wondered where we stood. We broke up and got back together so many times, that I wasn't even sure if he wanted to be with me. But now that we are married, I don't ever have to wonder again. Because he tells me and shows me how much he loves me every single day. And I can just kiss him and squeeze him and tell him how sexy he is whenever I want to. Because we're married.
So yeah, I swear that I'm not a marriage hater. I just think that there are a lot of good things to be said about both marriage and single life. So if you're single right now, don't be down on yourself. Enjoy that lifestyle while you can and get it all out of your system. Because you might just miss it. But don't let that lifestyle cause you to miss out on marriage, because to this day, marrying H is the one decision that I will never regret.
What do YOU think?